I shaved my head today.
Yes, buzzed it.
My hair went from middle to bottom of my back to fuzzy bald.
Unfortunately, my depression did terrible things to my drive this winter (I’ve mentioned in passing that getting into a beauty routine was one of the best things I’ve done for my sanity in a long time, and I’ve meant it) and the weather did the rest-the back of my head essentially dreaded to itself. There was no saving it. I knew for a long time that it was coming to this. [That was a very hard paragraph for me to write, but reading about people’s experiences with this on Reddit helped me immensely so if I can let one person know that it’s okay. these things happen, then I’m happy.]
So, not entirely on a whim and not entirely surprised, I had my sister shave my head for me this afternoon.
The first cut was the hardest but I’m surprisingly calm.
It’s a very decisive move-the people who love, really really love it and the people who hate it are vocal about hating it. But I veil in public most of the time anyway (part of the reason it took me so long to do it) so it’s not going to make that much of an impact on my social life.
How much of an impact did it have on me emotionally? I know that a lot of women put a lot of weight behind their hair. I’ve never been one to do that…it’s hair. It grows. So I never really had an emotional attachment to it, so going this extreme wasn’t that hard. I actually find it very freeing. I feel a lot lighter, and not just in the literal ‘I just shaved my waist length hair off’ sense.
Ultimately it’s just hair. It’ll grow back-which was the point, crop it and let it grow back healthier, because even if I managed to get it teased out it was going to be destroyed.
But do I recommend it? In a sense, yes. I want you to do the scary things. I want you to do the uncomfortable things. Because that’s how you make room for the new things.
And in the end it’s just hair. It grows back.